Posts Tagged ‘YACC’

It was starting to sprinkle as Lucy and I left the house for our usual after work walk and the air was crisp as I drew it into my nostrils. The cherry blossoms in full bloom I was reminded of the phrase “tree of life.” I have learned to imagine myself as a tree, firmly rooted in the ground, balanced no matter what comes my way. Swaying my arms as I dance, the same as the boughs and limbs of a tree move in the wind.

I also began to think of a new way of picturing this tree. That this tree of life represented every living thing I’ve known, and that when one person leaves or dies, a leaf falls from the tree.



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Chicken feet

The last post I wrote, was last Sunday, January 24, with no thought that I wouldn’t have time to post it. Well, it’s now exactly one week later and I can’t believe how slowly, but fast it went. Work was so crazy busy, but the days just felt sooo long. Very little breaks to rest for a whole week, I find myself feeling slightly defeated. I wonder how I’ll make it through the next month, but then realize, I’ll make it through. If I want to, I can make it through anything.

Yet, keeping that crazily positive point of view, isn’t always realistic. Or is it?

I sit today, thinking about goals and future plans for a number of things in my life. Today, a friend shared with me some details on making a goal journal. I think that’s imperative for me to do, in order for me to actually follow my dreams.

Speaking of dreams, I had some strange dreams last night – maybe it followed me playing “Crazy Taxi” on PS2. But I think I just received a revelation. I think the traffic lanes, going straight, turning right or left, meant choosing what’s either the most comfortable, or the best choice. I just went straight, but I passed by a smiling Indian woman in a Smart Set store, that the lane drove around (but seemingly drove through). Any thoughts? Am I needing to make a decision about some things? Yes, yes I sure do!

So, lets get to some goal setting:

7 life areas for future planning

1) Health, physical, energy

  • I could always be more health conscious. I mean, I have my moments, but I’m not always the “best that I could be”. There’s always room for improvement when it comes to dealing with the new body my journey through cancer gave me. Things are definitely different, and yes, it sucks, but there’s no point in focusing on it.
  • In order to feel the best with all three (health, physical, energy), it all comes down to BALANCE (the word for 2009), which I’m sure will be a recurring theme in the next five years. I’m in a highly developmental stage right now, one in which transition and acceptance seems to dominate. So, I think of ‘balance’ as being able to juggle the most important things to me, at that time in the minute, hour, day, month, year…you get the point.

2) Professional fulfillment

  • This, I’m currently working towards, yet I think I will eventually need to make a choice to stay Corporate, or move into Non-profit. I know there are pros and cons with each. I also know that I’m not yet ready to make that decision, and that I will need to re-analyze in a year or so. For now, the focus is on professional development in Corporate and Non-profit as I believe both will provide me a good balance (there’s that word again). I like to be able to see the whole picture, and having training on both sides will allow that.

3) Money/finances

  • This year HAS to be about keeping a budget and sticking to it. I MUST pay off my bills, in whatever format that may be (bankruptcy, credit-counselling, consolidation). It NEEDS to get done.
  • I want to buy a place towards the end of this year. I expect the market to drop after the Olympics have been out of Vancouver for about six months, and I really hope to profit from it. Also, I expect that my property owner, may want to move back.
  • Finances are a big deal for me this year. Having spent way too much prior to my diagnosis (as I’m sure the hormones were harshly affecting me then), during treatment (as I went into eight months of menopause) and post treatment (trying to get back to normal), spending money buying things that made me feel good, was highly meditative, and addictive – something about being diagnosed with ‘CANCER’ that makes you think you’re going to die ‘cuz that’s the connotation that came with ‘the word’  for me, meant that money didn’t matter anymore. What a fool I was, thinking that I was going to die, when my oncologists had given me such a good prognosis. Little did I know how much it had affected me.

4) Relationships with family & friends

  • Minus the lack of time I’ve had for friends during the lead-up to the Games, and during my Supervisory Training Certificate Program (STCP) course, I think I manage my relationships with family and friends quite well. In fact, today I took the opportunity of being in Vancouver, to catch up with a bunch of YACN (Young Adult Cancer Network) for Dim Sum, and a couple of girlfriends for coffee/kiddo playtime.
  • I’m so thankful to have such a variety of friends. And interestingly, I found a lot of them through dealing with cancer and being on my own (accepting and being happy that way).

5) Intimate relationship

  • Always a struggle for me, but when it comes down to it, it’s all about communication. I can’t hold back on things that are important to me, just because I’m afraid of what the other person will think. If they can’t handle it, then they shouldn’t be there. And I can’t just keep waiting for somebody else. I believe I put myself in those situations so I don’t have to deal with the long-term, cause I’m so afraid of the failure. Why do I set myself up for failure?
  • Ok, so goal this year, since I started it on my own, is likely to be on my own a lot this year. Or, to delve deep and work on a relationship with someone special, if they should choose to come along.

6) Emotional/spiritual

  • Since re-finding God on the Owyhee River in Oregon last July, I’ve felt a sense of relief regarding what I’d been searching for, for so long – peace. PEACE with myself and allowing all that is to happen, to happen, realizing that I have a choice on how I want to deal with it, and what point of view I take.
  • Since I’ve come to that acceptance, most of my life has really begun to FLOW.
  • I am cognizant of the change in my emotions through time, and voice them as necessary. I thankfully have such wonderful female friends that I can vent to!

7) Recreation, fun/free time

  • I’ve begun to realize that with the more I work, the harder I must play! This means hitting the gym, getting out and about, going hiking, letting my mind explore new things and places. I believe that I allow myself a good amount of time for fun and recreation – sometimes I come home and dance with the cat and dog! I love having music on, as it’s such an energy  motivator for me. Well, that and coffee!
  • Seeing that I love to be adventurous, I consider this aspect is covered in this section. I finally decided to eat a chicken foot today at Dim Sum

    Hmm...chicken feet...I think I'll try one.


Not that talking about chicken feet really flows into this next bit, but a short while ago, I got a message from my friend Alston, in Montreal…check this out I have something great to reveal. I made one of myself too, but didn’t like the photo I used! Ha ha! So, recreation, fun and free time are set!

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